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Who do you think should take custody of the child after divorce?

Hello, I’ve been going through a hectic divorce process with my ex and although our kids are still with me, we’ve been avoiding the custody conversation. We both know that there are many factors to consider, and that fighting over it will be bad for the kids. What’s best for our kids is our primary concern, but we also worry about how to manage our relationship with our kids in our lives. My ex earns more than I do and can comfortably provide for our kids, but I don’t think that should be the number one determining factor of who gets custody. I’m suspecting the court will have the final say because my ex doesn’t seem like he’s willing to give up custody. Nonetheless, generally speaking, who do you think should take custody of the kids after divorce?

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I think the mother should take custody of the child during a divorce and I'm saying this from the point of view that most mothers have better nurturing instincts and behavior to their children. They are more attuned to their children's needs especially when the child is less than 5 years old. Most mothers are the primary caregiver for their child. They are heavily involved in the feeding, bathing, playing, waking and putting to bed, making doctor appointments, arranging for childcare for their children.Frankly, many men would not be able to do this. Another thing is that children have a stronger bond with their mother than their father in most cases.

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Both parents 50/50 if safe, both parents are stable and interested in being involved. The kids will enjoy time with both parents and parents can maximize plans and time. Just because parents are enemies does not mean the children need to choose a side. The other parent might be your enemy but that doesn’t not make that person the children’s enemy.

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The parent who takes care of the rest of his/her family

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Personally, I think shared custody is better, so far both parents are responsible people who love their kids very much. This will enable the children to have both their father and mother albeit in a different way than before. However if this is not possible, I think the custody should go to the person that can provide, protect, nurture and care for the child the most. This would be the best thing for the child. The overall well-being of the child should be the first thing of concern when considering who to give custody of the child.

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